In today’s fast paced society, it is impossible to avoid stress in our lives. For married couples, external sources of stress around work in and out of the home and income are overriding stresses that couples try to deal with. Communication and functional ways of handling conflict are also vital.
Based on results from the first 20,000 couples to complete PREPARE/ENRICH, the top 5 stressors for married couples were:
- Your spouse
- Your job
- Feeling emotionally upset
- Inadequate income
- Too much to do around the home
Often times finances are an area of concern and/or stress for couples. More often than not, one or both partners are reticent about sharing their financial resources. This can provide a catalyst for discussing the meaning of the ‘giving’ of one to the other (as usually expressed in the marriage vows) and a ‘shared married life’.
Couples may find it difficult to reconcile independence, (frequently expressed as a control of money) with the mutuality and compromise that are characteristic of marital harmony.
Discussion: Use these questions to explore your spending habits and values with regards to finances:
- What are your spending habits now?
- What were the spending habits of your family?
- How do both of you believe money should be spent? Do you agree or disagree?
- What factors influence how you spend money?
- What will happen 15 or 20 years down the road if there is no change in your spending habits?
We haven’t decided how to handle our finances yet.
- Who will make the decision in regards to how you handle your finances?
- How will you set up your joint account(s)?
- How do you plan to spend, save, and/or give away a portion of your income?
- How can you work toward a financial plan?
Are you concerned that your partners is more of a spender than you? These can become serious issues in relationships and the earlier they are tackled, the better your relationship is likely to be. PREPARE/ENRICH has several resources to help you unpack and mine the assessment results around money.
Tune in for part 6 next week.
Do you need help with an issue or problem? Our approach helps to generate deep and productive conversations that couples would not otherwise have about their relationship. These conversations can restore insight and understanding about one another.
More tips at www.couplecheckup.com.au, tune in next week…
For more information on the use and analysis of the Couple Checkup or to simply use the tool, please contact: www.couplecheckup.com.au or call today (02) 9520 4049 #couplecheckup #relationship
Simply click on the Register button below relevant to your relationship – it couldn’t be easier. Once you have finished the questions you should receive your comprehensive personalised report in about 30 seconds.
The Couple Checkup generates deep and productive conversations that couples would not otherwise have about their relationship. These conversations restore insight and understanding about one another. The Couple Checkup can help to revive a relationship and increase intimacy.
The Couple Checkup is an online couple assessment based on the PREPARE/ENRICH couple inventories. The Checkup assessment and Checkup report are designed to go directly to couples at any stage of their relationship (dating, engaged or married). The online system allows for dynamic customization of the assessment to each couple based on how the couple answers background questions. The goal is for the Couple Checkup to reach a more diverse group of couples, to empower couples to deal with issues on their own and to emphasize prevention over remediation.